Something I am learning through this "growth opportunity" aka a big, honking TRIAL, is that I need to stop thinking that if I can just make it through this, life will be grand. I've always kind of had that thought of mind--we have times of trial, and times of peace, but they can't be simultaneous. However, if I just endure, the trial will be lifted and I can really enjoy life.
This is, like, a baby human being way of thinking. The adult way of thinking is that I signed up for trials when I decided to come to earth, and I'd better make the best of each situation, or I'm going to die, wondering when life was supposed to begin.
Several days over the past few months, I've wanted to beg Heavenly Father to help us, to help John, to comfort us, to take the trial away, to give us a miracle, but all I can do in my prayer is be thankful. In fact, my prayer becomes very lengthy as I think of all the blessings we have been given during this time. I feel overwhelmed, realizing that we have not been abandoned at all, but instead have been buoyed up and given so much.
However, I had a moment of weakness today. Let's face it--as much as I strive to be perfect (darn fat body keeps me constantly humble), I am not.
For the past two years, I have been the accompanist for the Slauson Middle School choir. While this might not seem that unusual, I should probably add an adjective into that sentence: I have been the paid accompanist for the Slauson Middle School choir. It has been the most wonderful experience for me, because it's gotten me back into the performance arena, and as most performers know, the longer you are away from performing, the more difficult it is to get back in. Nerves play a number on your performance, as does your lack of confidence from lack of experience. But we all know that the more you perform, the easier it becomes to get up on stage.
Such has been the case with me. In fact, I know that I have performed several times this winter and spring, but I don't even remember most of them because they are such a non-issue now. I hardly need to practice (that's always been the case), and I can just show up and be show-ready. The conductor, Mr. Steck, adores me...or at least adores the fact that I am consistently available, not having any other gigs nor a permanent job. Plus, I'm always on time, I come prepared, and I come through. And we have become friends.
It's been just another reason that I have loved living here.
Well today was the last performance that I know of with the choir. They won't perform again until next fall, and I don't know if I will even be in the area. I can just picture Mr. Steck shooting me a text with dates and times and asking if I'm available, and I'll have to answer "no" because I'll be in *insert future location here*.
Today was the elementary school tour where the middle school choir goes around to the different elementary schools that feed into Slauson, and the choir performs, hopefully encouraging the entering fifth/sixth graders to sign up for choir. It's 30 minutes of music, hop on the bus to the next school, set up, play 30 more minutes and repeat. We started at 8:00 this morning, and ended at 2:45. Last year, Glo was here with me, and she came with me, willing to turn pages and to just watch a music educator at work, so today was a bit bittersweet as I headed in alone. The schools aren't air conditioned so all of us are sweaty messes by the end of the day in our matching t-shirts.
I handed Mr. Steck my music after the last 30 minute segment, asked him for a selfie (he told me that he only had a second), and walked out the door. I cried from the moment I stepped outside until I pulled into my driveway.
While it has been yet another blessing for which I need to thank Heavenly Father, I am so sad to leave. I try to remain the optimist and think of all the new opportunities and friends that will be waiting for me in our next location, but I will miss this experience. I was made to play the piano, and it's been such a gift to have that chance to do it again, and to really have someone appreciate me. I keep hoping that Heavenly Father will let us stay here, but I know it's not in the cards. I'm just glad that I enjoyed the journey along the way this time.
P.S. Each school has it's own little song. One of the girls from Slauson (who had been a student at this elementary school) asked if the kids could sing their song with them. It's called "Friends are like diamonds", and it perfectly sums up why I love making music with kids. There's seriously nothing better. And the girl at the end of the song? She was crying <3
This is, like, a baby human being way of thinking. The adult way of thinking is that I signed up for trials when I decided to come to earth, and I'd better make the best of each situation, or I'm going to die, wondering when life was supposed to begin.
Several days over the past few months, I've wanted to beg Heavenly Father to help us, to help John, to comfort us, to take the trial away, to give us a miracle, but all I can do in my prayer is be thankful. In fact, my prayer becomes very lengthy as I think of all the blessings we have been given during this time. I feel overwhelmed, realizing that we have not been abandoned at all, but instead have been buoyed up and given so much.
However, I had a moment of weakness today. Let's face it--as much as I strive to be perfect (darn fat body keeps me constantly humble), I am not.
For the past two years, I have been the accompanist for the Slauson Middle School choir. While this might not seem that unusual, I should probably add an adjective into that sentence: I have been the paid accompanist for the Slauson Middle School choir. It has been the most wonderful experience for me, because it's gotten me back into the performance arena, and as most performers know, the longer you are away from performing, the more difficult it is to get back in. Nerves play a number on your performance, as does your lack of confidence from lack of experience. But we all know that the more you perform, the easier it becomes to get up on stage.
Such has been the case with me. In fact, I know that I have performed several times this winter and spring, but I don't even remember most of them because they are such a non-issue now. I hardly need to practice (that's always been the case), and I can just show up and be show-ready. The conductor, Mr. Steck, adores me...or at least adores the fact that I am consistently available, not having any other gigs nor a permanent job. Plus, I'm always on time, I come prepared, and I come through. And we have become friends.
It's been just another reason that I have loved living here.
Well today was the last performance that I know of with the choir. They won't perform again until next fall, and I don't know if I will even be in the area. I can just picture Mr. Steck shooting me a text with dates and times and asking if I'm available, and I'll have to answer "no" because I'll be in *insert future location here*.
Today was the elementary school tour where the middle school choir goes around to the different elementary schools that feed into Slauson, and the choir performs, hopefully encouraging the entering fifth/sixth graders to sign up for choir. It's 30 minutes of music, hop on the bus to the next school, set up, play 30 more minutes and repeat. We started at 8:00 this morning, and ended at 2:45. Last year, Glo was here with me, and she came with me, willing to turn pages and to just watch a music educator at work, so today was a bit bittersweet as I headed in alone. The schools aren't air conditioned so all of us are sweaty messes by the end of the day in our matching t-shirts.
 |
| I sit at the piano obviously ;-) (and check out the kid in the red shirt who is making a pig snout at his neighbor...) |
I handed Mr. Steck my music after the last 30 minute segment, asked him for a selfie (he told me that he only had a second), and walked out the door. I cried from the moment I stepped outside until I pulled into my driveway.While it has been yet another blessing for which I need to thank Heavenly Father, I am so sad to leave. I try to remain the optimist and think of all the new opportunities and friends that will be waiting for me in our next location, but I will miss this experience. I was made to play the piano, and it's been such a gift to have that chance to do it again, and to really have someone appreciate me. I keep hoping that Heavenly Father will let us stay here, but I know it's not in the cards. I'm just glad that I enjoyed the journey along the way this time.
P.S. Each school has it's own little song. One of the girls from Slauson (who had been a student at this elementary school) asked if the kids could sing their song with them. It's called "Friends are like diamonds", and it perfectly sums up why I love making music with kids. There's seriously nothing better. And the girl at the end of the song? She was crying <3
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