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For the past year and a half, I've been hanging onto church attendance.  I never miss sacrament meeting, but Sunday School and Relief Society have been a struggle.  Some of the people who hurt me deeply teach in those meetings, and I couldn't overcome the anxiety I felt attending them. Things have changed, however, since I received the calling to be a Gospel Doctrine teacher.  Honestly, it feels like nothing but mercy from God to have this calling.  I no longer feel isolated and persecuted, but I feel like I do belong somewhere on Sunday.  It's been one of the biggest blessings in my personal life in a very long time. Meetings have also started meaning as much as they used to to me.  I am able to listen to people's talks without feeling bad.  I'm so thankful for this, because I love church.  I always have, and I have missed it desperately in my life. I thought it might be nice for our family to share something that meant something to them in church today.  S

Since 2013, the end of spring/beginning of summer has meant the NBA playoffs for Rebecca and me. Seriously, I remember being in the middle of a Knicks and...Pacers? game when Rebecca told me she was okay with us getting married. In 2014, the two of us would head over to the MPA lounge on BYU campus to watch the Thunder take on the Spurs, and last summer we watched the inevitable march of the Warriors through the toughest teams in the NBA. So this summer is not likely to be any different. Well, actually there is one big difference; we are close to a big city that actually has an NBA team in the playoffs! Detroit made it for the first time in seven years, which was going to be fun regardless of whether or not they did anything. This picture was all Rebecca, just wanting to make sure she had proof that she saw her man! Now, something else you have to understand about us watching the NBA playoffs; I watch because I just like watching good basketball, but Rebecca watches because o

This morning I had one of those "if you give a mouse a cookie" moments.  I started out, taking papers to the computer, but something needed to go upstairs.  When I got there, I saw that my suitcase was still unpacked, so I started to put away the clothes that were still clean.  When I opened my schrank, I decided that I needed to go through my clothes and pull out things I don't wear.  When I looked at my top shelf (which has been bothering me for a while) and where I keep all things "sentimental", I decided to organize it. And that's where my story begins. Over the years, I've tried really hard to donate clothes that my kids outgrow.  However, there are always a few things that mean too much to me, and so I keep them.  I'm not any kind of hoarder--I have just a few things from each child.  However, it was good for me today to see some of the things I have saved from the life of Glo. I love the things in this picture.  All of them are from Gl

Back in January, when we several of us started our New Year off with fitness goals and dieting goals, Mr. Mark was feeling a bit left out.  After all, he's already fit (rowing) and he doesn't need to lose a pound (or he might just blow away), but he wanted to be included.  So, John and I set the goal for him to run a marathon, and to not only complete it, but finish it in under 3:30:00.  The prize he chose?  A trip to Cambodia to see Angkor Wat. We figured it would be a good idea if he had a practice run for the full 26.2 miles before the actual test day, and too, we figured it would be good for him to get away after his horn recital.  We were already headed out to Salt Lake City to see Hannie, and to run in the Salt Lake City marathon, so we bought him a ticket. And he started training. I can't tell you the number of funny pictures he would send to us of his training runs.  Always around Ford Lake, and almost always in the snow. The best part was that he wou

When Mark announced that he would be giving his junior horn recital back in January, I prepped myself for what I knew would be a wild ride.  I can remember when I myself would take on some competition or performance back in my musically competitive days; it meant that my life until that performance would be completely dedicated to practicing.  And Mark was no different. Too, there is a lot of mental preparation necessary.  It's easy to psyche yourself out as the day approaches.  There is always a negative voice in the back of your mind telling you that you aren't ready yet, and that you will NEVER be ready.  You start noticing how good everyone else is, and you start feeling that you will never play that well.  You wonder what bizarre thing will happen during the performance that has freaking never happened before , and you wonder how you will handle it when it does.  Yes, the struggle is real.  It's all about keeping everything together before you even set foot on stage.

I wear a lot of Michigan apparel.  I have probably too many t-shirts, advertising my favorite school and the school that my boys attend.  I get a lot of comments too whenever I wear any of it.  Most of the time it's positive--people asking if I went there, telling me that they went there--but occasionally people like to tease me about it, especially if their school colors are scarlet and grey. Today, I headed to JoAnn Fabrics with leftover Michigan fabric that I had bought in Ann Arbor months ago.  I'm making a dress for Baby, and I needed to match thread and a zipper to the fabric.  Afterwards, I tucked the fabric into the JoAnn's bag, and I walked over to Barnes and Noble.  I headed to the bathroom first, seeing as they don't want any merchandise taken from there, and since I knew that I would eventually need to go in there.  As I was opening the door to the women's restroom, I heard, "Excuse me" behind me.  I was prepared to explain that I had no book

Yep, another PMEA year has come and gone.  And this year, we had a new winner.  Glo, after hours and hours, and have I mentioned HOURS of practicing, advanced to All-State festival for orchestra, a feat that had not been accomplished by her siblings. She also made it to Regional Chorus, but since she had already auditioned for, and advanced to All-State on violin, she didn't put much time into practicing her chorus music.  In all honesty, who can blame her? :-) It wasn't perfectly easy though.  When Glo auditioned at Districts (the first level) on first violin, she was seated eleventh chair, which meant she didn't automatically move forward to Regionals.  She had to reaudition (along with seven other kids) for three spots in second violin.  I had never been so thankful that she and I had worked on that erudition piece, despite the fact that we didn't think she would need it.  It was an excerpt from an unheard piece, and in the end, we could only find a recording

For me, the struggle of being a stay-at-home mom never ends.  In fact, as my last child is only a year away from leaving for college, I'm feeling the pressure even more to "find myself".  People are beginning to ask me exactly what I'm going to do with my days once Glo leaves. Through the years, I have gone back to school several times:  once after Ethan was born, once when we moved to East Lansing, and just recently through BYU's Independent Study program.  I have also held down various small jobs, mostly working as a receptionist for different people, but also testing the waters as a professional accompanist.  I do these things because I get the feeling that I must do them; that I need a diploma on the wall to validate my intelligence, or a paycheck to validate my existence.  I tell myself, because the world tells me, that there is no way I can be personally fulfilled as "just" a mother. With Glo being gone to PMEA All-State Orchestra festival thi