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Showing posts from June, 2014

Dealing with Abandonment

You know those quizzes that ask you your three best traits? Today I'm answering the non-existent quiz that asks me for my three worst. 1.  I'm insecure in regards to relationships. 2.  I have a constant voice in my head, telling me that I am worthless. 3.  It is almost impossible for me to forgive people who have hurt me. No joke, consciously or not, I have had these feelings much of my life, and certainly for my entire adult life. My heart goes out to my family, but especially to John.  He is such a support to me, helping me through the times when I don't think there's much reason for my existence on this earth. I credit these feelings to not really having any feeling of belonging to a family, and to my own choices. In other words, I blame others, but I also blame myself. My family life in a nutshell.  My parents divorced when I was three, and when my mother remarried (when I was six), my father relinquished all rights to me.  From what my paternal grandm

Graduation Day!

Please tell me this isn't happening.  One more child done with high school?  This just can't be.  If the proverbial brick would work, I would put it on their heads! For the first time, I was actually excited for graduation weekend.  I had just about the most perfect gift to give Hannie, and it was hard to wait for the day. Earlier in the week, Johannah was one of about 100 kids invited to the Senior Awards ceremony.  Sometimes the kids know what award they are getting, some don't.  Hannah didn't think much of the invitation (thinking that it might just be certificates for PMEA), but her choir director, Mr. Drafall, approached her and encouraged her to go, because as he said, there might be a check involved (channel the Grinch here).  Uh yeah, nothing will get the Kennedys to do more than free money, am I right? Turns out, she won the James T. Langston award given to a senior for a superior GPA and plans to earn a degree in music from an accredited four-year co

Taking the High Road

Taking the high road.  It seems to be a theme in the lives of the Kennedy family.  In fact, I may have written about it before which makes me question if perhaps some future family members will feel the same pain and will want comfort. With that in mind, and with the love that I already feel for future Kennedy generations, I'm going to share very raw, very real feelings. I hate taking the high road.  In very few situations does it ends up being a good thing for me.  In fact, in my mind, I end up in a world of hurt, and I once again question why I feel the need to do it in the first place. About four years ago, I was called as a Sunday School teacher.  I wasn't too sure about the calling at first, because I was given the oldest youth in our ward (Mark was in the class at the time).  That can be a tricky age--not quite an adult, but not wanting to be treated like a child.  I expected just one thing from the kids:  respect.  I'm not talking the kind of respect that must be