I have no idea how to write about the last three days of my life. They were exhausting, and frustrating, and amazing, and fulfilling, and spiritual, and unbelievable, and disorganized. Do I need to go into all the details? I don't know. Let's see where this goes.
First off, I was incredibly excited to go. I like new adventures, and I like to learn new things. I never went to youth conference as a youth, and I've never attended one as an adult, so I felt the same excitement that I think a child feels about going to Disneyland, or Grandma's house. In that excitement, I also forgot to take any pictures. I kid you not--me, the "Chronicler", forgot.
Let's start with some of the "trials", shall we?
The Young Women's president is a self-proclaimed disorganized person, and to her credit, she fulfills that role well. Things were terribly disorganized, and at times, it was extremely frustrating not knowing where to go, or what was happening in the next hour, or even what we should do to prepare as "parents". Too, we made plans for something that was supposed to last "15-20 minutes" but were left with an hour to entertain twelve kids, all different ages, and from different units within the stake. With several children who had all kinds of disorders or social issues or who could hardly even read or spell, it wasn't like we could sit down at a picnic table with a game of Siedler to pass the time. I think we had only one girl who liked any kind of athletics while the boys were constantly running off to kick the soccer ball or hit the volleyball (talk about gender stereotypes, sheesh!). And things were complicated by the fact that we did things as a "family" during the day, but we camped at night as wards. So when we were supposed to gather our family at night for s'mores, it was impossible to find everyone in the dark. Those were the tricky things that I'd rather forget.
Camping. Holy smokes, it's been a long while since either John or I have been camping. And this was rustic camping with no showers, running water, or toilets. So there were a million bugs that withdrew hundreds of gallons of blood from our righteous veins. And the heat. 90+ degrees everyday with no rain but high humidity. And did I mention that there were over 100 youth, and no showers? John and I had a tent, and Glo had a tent that she ended up sharing with Sage Barney, a daughter of the Barneys who just got out of the Air Force and who have been great friends to us over the past few months. We had five porta-potties/outhouses for all those people too, and a pump for water. The first night, it rained (of course), and John had to get up at 5:30 a.m. to put on our rain fly (we had left it off to try and increase the breeze coming through the windows) and the second night, it was hotter than Hades. And the first night, the girls in one of our ward's tents decided to stay up talking LOUDLY until 2:30 at which point we heard Brother Barney yelling, "GIRLS! IT'S 2:30!!" After only two and a half hours sleep that night, none of us was too happy the following morning.
And just hours before the conference was over, and we were riding a spiritual high, one of the stake YW leaders confronted me and the Barneys full-on, in the face, in front of everyone, telling us what horrible people we are for having some concerns during the conference, and that Glo's poor attitude is a reflection of how we felt. It was mostly a reaction to the Barneys very loud complaining about the disorganization, but in their defense, they are military and they know how to run things really, really well. So when that stake leader asked them if they had ever planned anything for that many people, and knowing that they have been commander/commander spouse, I just stepped back and let that confrontation happen. But when she attacked Glo and Glo's complaining the morning after we had gotten so little sleep (and that leader's daughters happened to be two of the very inconsiderate girls), everyone took her down. We had been fielding all kinds of complaining for the 48 hours from both boys and girls, old and young, and from the stake leader's daughters (who just so happened to be in our "family"), but John and I hadn't felt the need to lash out at anyone because of their kids. Kids are kids, and we are all tired, raw and emotional. She ended up apologizing after we told her she was way out of line, and her methods of confronting us were ill-timed, but it still left a bad taste in our mouths, especially after we had sacrificed so much to be there ($6,000 moonlighting in Altoona, and John's dream of a concert of Def Leppard and Journey playing at Comerica Park).
How was everything else? It was good. Really good. I wish that it was easy to connect with kids within minutes of meeting them, but it's definitely more of a very slow progression. When we could get them to be around us (and not running off to be with their friends), we gave everything to find out more about them. Their likes, their dislikes, their families, their situations. Sometimes we had other kids join our "family" because they had seen what we were doing and were interested, and sometimes we couldn't find all 12 of our children. It almost felt that we had finally figured some of them out by the time we were packing up and heading out. It was definitely challenging.
Now, some of the highlights and spiritual moments:
The Barneys. Our friendship with them has been kind of a slow burn. We've tried to hit it off for a while, and things finally clicked a month or two ago. I feel like we've been friends forever now. I love their kids, my kids love them and their kids, and I think they like us reasonably well ;-). We see eye-to-eye on a lot of things, but they are definitely vocal and uncensored when they see something they don't like (making some awkward moments for me), but they're also vocal and uncensored when they see something terrific. It was a blessing that we were there for each other and got to camp together.
It felt like everything really started the second day we were there when Mark and Allison showed up. I do not kid you--between struggling to connect with our kids and feeling the stress of things being so disorganized and trying to keep it all together, when they drove up, I literally wanted to run over, throw my arms around them, have a good cry and have them take me home. But they were there to run the boat regatta.
So, the theme of the week was "Lehi's Journey", and much of what we did centered around Lehi leaving Jerusalem and his vision of the tree of life. President Olsen, our resident Met-Opera singer, counselor in the stake presidency, and good friend to the Kennedy family, continually popped up, acting as Lehi. The first real activity related to that topic was "building a boat" which Mark and Allison led.
I love my kids. I love that Mark has become this amazing human being who has been taught to do amazing things by John and me. No joke, I felt such pride in seeing how organized and together his activity was. In fact, I heard from many people that they just loved it, and I know much of that goes to the fact that Mark was prepared. For the past few months, he has been gathering all the materials for a cardboard boat regatta. He has made connections all around the greater metro Detroit area to collect what he would need. He has done research on construction. When he and Allison showed up in the Bosses' truck, they had everything. All they needed was people to help them carry the supplies to the shore. And when I asked Mark what we needed to do, he got everyone working immediately so things were quickly ready for the kids. It was a salve to my open, gaping, sore wound of watching my life slip through my fingers as people tried to figure things out the day before.
He gave us some simple rules about constructing our boats, and he gave us an hour to make them. We had cardboard, a plastic sheet, some bubble wrap, two pool noodles, a roll of duct tape and these stiff cardboard rails. That was it. I figured the hour would be too much time (seeing as we had done nothing but have too much time the day before), but it literally came down to the last minute. And what a blessing it was to see all of our families working together on one goal (and not half of them walking away, bored out of their minds). It was 1 p.m., and the sun was blazing hot, but everybody worked together. And what fantastic boats there were! Some were paddle boards (a cheat in my mind), some were dragon boats (which obviously took the prize for the most creative), and some were traditional boats.
Ours? The Kennedy family built the cruise ship of the fleet, being able to hold more people than
anyone else's. We didn't win any of the races, and despite decorating our ship with leaves and christening it "Leaf-hi", we didn't win any artistic prizes either. But my kids were winners when they were the only kids afterwards still playing around in our boat. It was hilarious, and fun, and probably the first thing that had happened that was meaningful.
Seriously, after we had lost every race, the kids couldn't wait to climb in, see how many people could actually fit in the boat, and sail around. The "sailing" part didn't last long ;-)
And what a glorious hour afterwards, just floating in the cool lake. We needed it. It killed me to see Mark and Allison leave, but it felt like their activity jump-started the rest of the conference, because from there, it just got better!
There was a really great moment later that afternoon when every person, youth and adult, was handed a folded sheet of paper with four pages of The Book of Mormon pasted on it (kudos to the person who cut up two complete copies of the Book of Mormon and pasted them on the paper). With the number of people we had there, and with everyone reading their four pages, we ended up reading the entire Book of Mormon in that hour. It was so beautifully quiet, especially since many of the kids fell asleep after our long afternoon in the lake ;-). But how touching to think that we, as a group, had read one of the most important books in print.
And to follow up that event, as families we created Peeps dioramas. We were supposed to pick a Book of Mormon story and recreate it using Peeps (yes, the Easter marshmallow confections), a shoe box, some construction paper, pipe cleaners and markers. My kids chose Abinadi burning at the stake. Again, I was so proud to see one of my kids take the lead. Glo, who has never had a positive youth experience, was allowed to come to youth conference as an adult leader. However, she quickly found friends and fit in with several of the youth from our ward. She organized our 12-person family, giving everyone a job, and it didn't take long for our diorama to appear. I was so proud of her that I actually took a picture--she has such a natural gift for teaching!
Lehi returned again, telling us that we were going to be hiking into the wilderness (yes, more hiking and sweating), but this time, he came with Sariah. Jennifer Olsen, my visiting teacher and my friend, convinced all of us that she was indeed Sariah with her description of her feelings of being Lehi's wife. She gave me a whole new appreciation for what Sariah went through, being married to Lehi and choosing to support him and his visions.
The best activity though happened that night. The stake president, President Ward, arrived and spoke to us a long time (my heat-exhausted mind can't tell you what he said specifically). Afterwards, we were told to remain quiet, because we were going to experience our own vision of the Tree of Life (sounds like we're going to smoke some pot, or something, doesn't it?). The leaders had created an iron rod using rope and stakes, and had built it through the forest, using fog machines for mists of darkness, people who knew us to try and draw us off the path, and just darkness in general. We honestly had to hold onto the rope to get to the end.
The leaders did a good job of staggering the kids as they departed down the strait and narrow path, and the kids did a good job of taking it seriously and being reverent. When all of the kids had gone, we leaders got to go too (and I was a bit hesitant, not knowing beforehand everything I have already described). We were hot, exhausted, soaked with bug spray, and it was dark, but I headed off down the path alone. There were times of feeling actually scared, but I was hit with the thought that if I just held to the rod, I wouldn't be lost.
At the end (unbeknownst to any of us beforehand), a tree that sits in the center of camp had been covered with white lights--like, lights on every branch--and in the darkness, it served as a beacon. I felt so relieved as I came out of the darkness and saw the tree with all of our families sitting quietly underneath it. And standing in front of it were Lehi and Sariah, aka President Olsen and Jennifer. The rod ended probably thirty feet away, and I felt very insecure about where I was supposed to go or what I was supposed to do once I came to the end of the rod. But just as I got there, I heard Jennifer's voice say quietly, "You're almost there. Come to me," at which point I ran into her arms and hugged her. And then I hugged President Olsen. And then I went straight to my family and sat with them quietly too. It was so beautiful.
So, the next day, the kids were given letters from their parents, and we had a testimony meeting. The stake president told them that specifically that they weren't supposed to relate stories or talk about their youth conference families, but they were supposed to only testify of truth. Needless to say, the testimonies were very short, although kids kept going up for a good hour. Interspersed, he would invite the leaders of the conference to come up and bear their testimonies too. What a surprise when he asked "Brother or Sister Kennedy" to come up. John and I only heard "Brother Orr, Sister Kennedy" so we were looking around for Brother Orr to bear his testimony before I got up ;-)
In all honesty, I knew I was supposed to go up and bear my testimony. I knew I would be asked. And I feel like I only knew that because I was already planning on writing notes to different people, telling them how their service had strengthened my testimony. Well, getting up took care of needing to write anyone, considering most of them were sitting there already.
In the interest of making this easier to write, I'll try and write this out as I thought about it before I got up (although I don''t remember what I specifically said), and I started crying just seconds after I started speaking:
"I commend all of you youth, getting up here without being asked to come up. I'm shaking like a leaf right now, so good for you all, having the courage to do it. *I gave them a thumbs up, and they laughed.* I like to keep things real, so that's what I'll do today with my testimony.
I grew up in a different situation. My father died when I was three (not right, but it's what I said, and it gets the point across), and my mother was inactive in the church. I had no aunts, no uncles, and no siblings, and I often felt alone. It was a real struggle for me to go to church because I didn't fit in. When people spoke of families, I knew I didn't really have one. And when I thought of the tree of life and Lehi and Sariah beckoning to their family at the end, I wondered who was there, beckoning to me. I grew up in the Ann Arbor stake, but people didn't know what was going on in my home. I looked happy at church, but things were really hard for me.
Last night, when I came through the forest, following the rod of iron, I looked up and saw Lehi and Sariah there. Brother Kennedy and I just moved here last year, and the Olsens were the first friends we had. I came to the end of the rod of iron, and I didn't know which way to go, kind of like I felt when I was a youth. I could see all of you, but I didn't know where my family was. But last night, as all those feelings of insecurity arose in me, I heard the quiet voice of Sister Olsen, telling me that I was almost there. That I just needed to come to her.
I have always worried that there will be nobody there for me at the end. My parents are certainly not beckoning to me to come and partake of the fruit. And some of you might feel that too. You might not feel like you belong. Things may be happening in your life that nobody understands. You might wonder where you are supposed to go. But I testify to you that we are here for you; that if you have nobody else, you have us as your "parents" and your leaders, and we will do everything we can to help you to the tree.
I love the Gospel. It has saved me from a life that could have been quite different if I hadn't had it. And I love my Savior. He is there for you. He wants you to taste of the fruit. He wants you to feel of his love. And I testify of these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen."
I know it's not good to judge the worth of a testimony, but there were so many people wiping away tears at the end, both adults and kids that I couldn't help but think that I did have something to contribute in my testimony even though it didn't fit the guidelines. And just like in life, where it's easy to focus on the daily grind and obstacles, it's the bigger picture and our Savior's plan that should be our main focus. It's that kind of happiness which wipes out any menial, stupid, earthly cares and reminds us of what life is all about.
I told the Barneys afterwards that I wasn't hoping to be invited to do this again (they asked because they want to do it again, hopefully in charge, and they want us there again), but I think asking me so soon is like asking a new mom if she wants to have another baby. Give me some time to forget about the frustrations, and let my bug bites and sunburn disappear, and I'll hopefully be left with only the really choice memories.
First off, I was incredibly excited to go. I like new adventures, and I like to learn new things. I never went to youth conference as a youth, and I've never attended one as an adult, so I felt the same excitement that I think a child feels about going to Disneyland, or Grandma's house. In that excitement, I also forgot to take any pictures. I kid you not--me, the "Chronicler", forgot.
Let's start with some of the "trials", shall we?
The Young Women's president is a self-proclaimed disorganized person, and to her credit, she fulfills that role well. Things were terribly disorganized, and at times, it was extremely frustrating not knowing where to go, or what was happening in the next hour, or even what we should do to prepare as "parents". Too, we made plans for something that was supposed to last "15-20 minutes" but were left with an hour to entertain twelve kids, all different ages, and from different units within the stake. With several children who had all kinds of disorders or social issues or who could hardly even read or spell, it wasn't like we could sit down at a picnic table with a game of Siedler to pass the time. I think we had only one girl who liked any kind of athletics while the boys were constantly running off to kick the soccer ball or hit the volleyball (talk about gender stereotypes, sheesh!). And things were complicated by the fact that we did things as a "family" during the day, but we camped at night as wards. So when we were supposed to gather our family at night for s'mores, it was impossible to find everyone in the dark. Those were the tricky things that I'd rather forget.
Camping. Holy smokes, it's been a long while since either John or I have been camping. And this was rustic camping with no showers, running water, or toilets. So there were a million bugs that withdrew hundreds of gallons of blood from our righteous veins. And the heat. 90+ degrees everyday with no rain but high humidity. And did I mention that there were over 100 youth, and no showers? John and I had a tent, and Glo had a tent that she ended up sharing with Sage Barney, a daughter of the Barneys who just got out of the Air Force and who have been great friends to us over the past few months. We had five porta-potties/outhouses for all those people too, and a pump for water. The first night, it rained (of course), and John had to get up at 5:30 a.m. to put on our rain fly (we had left it off to try and increase the breeze coming through the windows) and the second night, it was hotter than Hades. And the first night, the girls in one of our ward's tents decided to stay up talking LOUDLY until 2:30 at which point we heard Brother Barney yelling, "GIRLS! IT'S 2:30!!" After only two and a half hours sleep that night, none of us was too happy the following morning.
And just hours before the conference was over, and we were riding a spiritual high, one of the stake YW leaders confronted me and the Barneys full-on, in the face, in front of everyone, telling us what horrible people we are for having some concerns during the conference, and that Glo's poor attitude is a reflection of how we felt. It was mostly a reaction to the Barneys very loud complaining about the disorganization, but in their defense, they are military and they know how to run things really, really well. So when that stake leader asked them if they had ever planned anything for that many people, and knowing that they have been commander/commander spouse, I just stepped back and let that confrontation happen. But when she attacked Glo and Glo's complaining the morning after we had gotten so little sleep (and that leader's daughters happened to be two of the very inconsiderate girls), everyone took her down. We had been fielding all kinds of complaining for the 48 hours from both boys and girls, old and young, and from the stake leader's daughters (who just so happened to be in our "family"), but John and I hadn't felt the need to lash out at anyone because of their kids. Kids are kids, and we are all tired, raw and emotional. She ended up apologizing after we told her she was way out of line, and her methods of confronting us were ill-timed, but it still left a bad taste in our mouths, especially after we had sacrificed so much to be there ($6,000 moonlighting in Altoona, and John's dream of a concert of Def Leppard and Journey playing at Comerica Park).
How was everything else? It was good. Really good. I wish that it was easy to connect with kids within minutes of meeting them, but it's definitely more of a very slow progression. When we could get them to be around us (and not running off to be with their friends), we gave everything to find out more about them. Their likes, their dislikes, their families, their situations. Sometimes we had other kids join our "family" because they had seen what we were doing and were interested, and sometimes we couldn't find all 12 of our children. It almost felt that we had finally figured some of them out by the time we were packing up and heading out. It was definitely challenging.
Now, some of the highlights and spiritual moments:
The Barneys. Our friendship with them has been kind of a slow burn. We've tried to hit it off for a while, and things finally clicked a month or two ago. I feel like we've been friends forever now. I love their kids, my kids love them and their kids, and I think they like us reasonably well ;-). We see eye-to-eye on a lot of things, but they are definitely vocal and uncensored when they see something they don't like (making some awkward moments for me), but they're also vocal and uncensored when they see something terrific. It was a blessing that we were there for each other and got to camp together.
So, the theme of the week was "Lehi's Journey", and much of what we did centered around Lehi leaving Jerusalem and his vision of the tree of life. President Olsen, our resident Met-Opera singer, counselor in the stake presidency, and good friend to the Kennedy family, continually popped up, acting as Lehi. The first real activity related to that topic was "building a boat" which Mark and Allison led.
I love my kids. I love that Mark has become this amazing human being who has been taught to do amazing things by John and me. No joke, I felt such pride in seeing how organized and together his activity was. In fact, I heard from many people that they just loved it, and I know much of that goes to the fact that Mark was prepared. For the past few months, he has been gathering all the materials for a cardboard boat regatta. He has made connections all around the greater metro Detroit area to collect what he would need. He has done research on construction. When he and Allison showed up in the Bosses' truck, they had everything. All they needed was people to help them carry the supplies to the shore. And when I asked Mark what we needed to do, he got everyone working immediately so things were quickly ready for the kids. It was a salve to my open, gaping, sore wound of watching my life slip through my fingers as people tried to figure things out the day before.
He gave us some simple rules about constructing our boats, and he gave us an hour to make them. We had cardboard, a plastic sheet, some bubble wrap, two pool noodles, a roll of duct tape and these stiff cardboard rails. That was it. I figured the hour would be too much time (seeing as we had done nothing but have too much time the day before), but it literally came down to the last minute. And what a blessing it was to see all of our families working together on one goal (and not half of them walking away, bored out of their minds). It was 1 p.m., and the sun was blazing hot, but everybody worked together. And what fantastic boats there were! Some were paddle boards (a cheat in my mind), some were dragon boats (which obviously took the prize for the most creative), and some were traditional boats.
Ours? The Kennedy family built the cruise ship of the fleet, being able to hold more people than
 |
| This is just a small contingent of our family. |
Seriously, after we had lost every race, the kids couldn't wait to climb in, see how many people could actually fit in the boat, and sail around. The "sailing" part didn't last long ;-)
 |
Look closely at Maddy Christie's face as the boat tips. You will PEE YOUR PANTS, LAUGHING AT HER! (And yes, she laughed even harder seeing the pictures of herself.) Thank goodness, Mark, in all his boating wisdom, watched from the shore, counting heads after the boat tipped, and got the kids to lift the boat out of the water, revealing Maddy still underneath it ;-)
 |
| Some of my "family", passed out in the shade, after reading our pages from the Book of Mormon. |
And to follow up that event, as families we created Peeps dioramas. We were supposed to pick a Book of Mormon story and recreate it using Peeps (yes, the Easter marshmallow confections), a shoe box, some construction paper, pipe cleaners and markers. My kids chose Abinadi burning at the stake. Again, I was so proud to see one of my kids take the lead. Glo, who has never had a positive youth experience, was allowed to come to youth conference as an adult leader. However, she quickly found friends and fit in with several of the youth from our ward. She organized our 12-person family, giving everyone a job, and it didn't take long for our diorama to appear. I was so proud of her that I actually took a picture--she has such a natural gift for teaching!
Lehi returned again, telling us that we were going to be hiking into the wilderness (yes, more hiking and sweating), but this time, he came with Sariah. Jennifer Olsen, my visiting teacher and my friend, convinced all of us that she was indeed Sariah with her description of her feelings of being Lehi's wife. She gave me a whole new appreciation for what Sariah went through, being married to Lehi and choosing to support him and his visions.The best activity though happened that night. The stake president, President Ward, arrived and spoke to us a long time (my heat-exhausted mind can't tell you what he said specifically). Afterwards, we were told to remain quiet, because we were going to experience our own vision of the Tree of Life (sounds like we're going to smoke some pot, or something, doesn't it?). The leaders had created an iron rod using rope and stakes, and had built it through the forest, using fog machines for mists of darkness, people who knew us to try and draw us off the path, and just darkness in general. We honestly had to hold onto the rope to get to the end.
The leaders did a good job of staggering the kids as they departed down the strait and narrow path, and the kids did a good job of taking it seriously and being reverent. When all of the kids had gone, we leaders got to go too (and I was a bit hesitant, not knowing beforehand everything I have already described). We were hot, exhausted, soaked with bug spray, and it was dark, but I headed off down the path alone. There were times of feeling actually scared, but I was hit with the thought that if I just held to the rod, I wouldn't be lost.
At the end (unbeknownst to any of us beforehand), a tree that sits in the center of camp had been covered with white lights--like, lights on every branch--and in the darkness, it served as a beacon. I felt so relieved as I came out of the darkness and saw the tree with all of our families sitting quietly underneath it. And standing in front of it were Lehi and Sariah, aka President Olsen and Jennifer. The rod ended probably thirty feet away, and I felt very insecure about where I was supposed to go or what I was supposed to do once I came to the end of the rod. But just as I got there, I heard Jennifer's voice say quietly, "You're almost there. Come to me," at which point I ran into her arms and hugged her. And then I hugged President Olsen. And then I went straight to my family and sat with them quietly too. It was so beautiful.
So, the next day, the kids were given letters from their parents, and we had a testimony meeting. The stake president told them that specifically that they weren't supposed to relate stories or talk about their youth conference families, but they were supposed to only testify of truth. Needless to say, the testimonies were very short, although kids kept going up for a good hour. Interspersed, he would invite the leaders of the conference to come up and bear their testimonies too. What a surprise when he asked "Brother or Sister Kennedy" to come up. John and I only heard "Brother Orr, Sister Kennedy" so we were looking around for Brother Orr to bear his testimony before I got up ;-)
In all honesty, I knew I was supposed to go up and bear my testimony. I knew I would be asked. And I feel like I only knew that because I was already planning on writing notes to different people, telling them how their service had strengthened my testimony. Well, getting up took care of needing to write anyone, considering most of them were sitting there already.
In the interest of making this easier to write, I'll try and write this out as I thought about it before I got up (although I don''t remember what I specifically said), and I started crying just seconds after I started speaking:
"I commend all of you youth, getting up here without being asked to come up. I'm shaking like a leaf right now, so good for you all, having the courage to do it. *I gave them a thumbs up, and they laughed.* I like to keep things real, so that's what I'll do today with my testimony.
I grew up in a different situation. My father died when I was three (not right, but it's what I said, and it gets the point across), and my mother was inactive in the church. I had no aunts, no uncles, and no siblings, and I often felt alone. It was a real struggle for me to go to church because I didn't fit in. When people spoke of families, I knew I didn't really have one. And when I thought of the tree of life and Lehi and Sariah beckoning to their family at the end, I wondered who was there, beckoning to me. I grew up in the Ann Arbor stake, but people didn't know what was going on in my home. I looked happy at church, but things were really hard for me.
Last night, when I came through the forest, following the rod of iron, I looked up and saw Lehi and Sariah there. Brother Kennedy and I just moved here last year, and the Olsens were the first friends we had. I came to the end of the rod of iron, and I didn't know which way to go, kind of like I felt when I was a youth. I could see all of you, but I didn't know where my family was. But last night, as all those feelings of insecurity arose in me, I heard the quiet voice of Sister Olsen, telling me that I was almost there. That I just needed to come to her.
I have always worried that there will be nobody there for me at the end. My parents are certainly not beckoning to me to come and partake of the fruit. And some of you might feel that too. You might not feel like you belong. Things may be happening in your life that nobody understands. You might wonder where you are supposed to go. But I testify to you that we are here for you; that if you have nobody else, you have us as your "parents" and your leaders, and we will do everything we can to help you to the tree.
I love the Gospel. It has saved me from a life that could have been quite different if I hadn't had it. And I love my Savior. He is there for you. He wants you to taste of the fruit. He wants you to feel of his love. And I testify of these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen."
I know it's not good to judge the worth of a testimony, but there were so many people wiping away tears at the end, both adults and kids that I couldn't help but think that I did have something to contribute in my testimony even though it didn't fit the guidelines. And just like in life, where it's easy to focus on the daily grind and obstacles, it's the bigger picture and our Savior's plan that should be our main focus. It's that kind of happiness which wipes out any menial, stupid, earthly cares and reminds us of what life is all about.
I told the Barneys afterwards that I wasn't hoping to be invited to do this again (they asked because they want to do it again, hopefully in charge, and they want us there again), but I think asking me so soon is like asking a new mom if she wants to have another baby. Give me some time to forget about the frustrations, and let my bug bites and sunburn disappear, and I'll hopefully be left with only the really choice memories.
That’s a beautiful post mama(: thanks for immortalizing the boat regatta and showing us how the weekend went(: it’s really nice to read your thoughts in reflection(:
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