It's hard to believe that this will be my eighth summer at Interlochen (ninth if you count me dropping off Mark back in 2008). I'm not sure what we would do with our summer months if we didn't head up north each June. It's been a blessing in our lives.
This year, I was told that I was being moved to a different health center from the one I've been in for the past three summers. I never like the idea of change (although I'm usually fine with it once it happens, and this doesn't apply at all to moving), but for me, this was more than that. When I was moved from JIG Health Center to Boys Health Center three years ago, I was surprised, but a bit relieved. My supervisor at JIG was really hard for me to handle. While she is a good Christian woman, she talks a lot, and she talks a lot about herself and her family. Do you know those kinds of people? I know that when she asks a general question about my kids, she really expects me to answer in one sentence while she then goes on for ten minutes talking about her kids....and her step kids, and her step kids' boyfriends and girlfriends...and her ex-husband with whom she is still friends. I don't mind this so much, except that I actually listen, and at the end of an eight hour shift with this, I have a killer headache. No joke, I leave emotionally drained.
So, the idea of heading back to JIG and to this same supervisor was literally making me ill. And incredibly depressed. I just couldn't imagine having to spend five days a week for the next three weeks with her, as well as have nobody at home when I got home. Everyday leading up to the start of work, I was considering quitting. John even lovingly offered to just pay the full tuition amount for Glo so that I could just come home.
However, I wanted to give it a couple of days if possible, and while the day loomed closer, a thought came to my head.
I frequently pray that people will change. I pray that they will see (at least in this case) how tiring or annoying or hard-to-live-with they are. Or I pray that they will change, or that maybe my situation will change so that I don't need to deal with them.
This time, however, I took a different route. It's a route that my own husband mastered when he was probably three years old, and that my children probably already know. It's something that I should know, but being emotionally stunted in some ways, it's never occurred to me.
I decided to pray that I would be able to handle the incessant diatribes of my supervisor, and that I wouldn't be so bothered by them. In other words, I prayed for my own strength instead of hoping that someone else would be different.
And do you know what? It's worked. And not only that, it's worked so brilliantly that this is probably the best situation for work that I've ever had at Interlochen.
Here's an example:
In the past, when this supervisor asked me about my kids, and then cut me off and started talking about her own, I would be frustrated, wondering when I was going to get my chance to talk. And I would spend the ten minutes while she was talking thinking about what I was going to say and how I was going to get a word in edgewise. And then, just when it was my turn, she would either leave, or a patient would come in, or something would prevent me from sharing my story. In other words, I would have great expectations of us having a meaningful discussion, and when we didn't, I would hate her and the situation.
Now? I have no expectations. I see Nancy as a child of God who is just trying to do her best in this world. And too, I appreciate that she has no malicious intentions. She really has no idea that she is the way she is.
And I'm just fine with it all. I listen to her for as long as I can, and then I stand up and go do something else. And unlike me, she takes no offense from that (which I probably would).
It's been a wake-up call for me, and a great learning experience. And as it turns out, it's been the best summer I've had at Interlochen so far. I really do love going to work with Nancy and Jay each morning. Unfortunately, I'm not good "on the fly" and I don't know if I could call on these powers in a situation that I don't expect. However, I'm glad that it worked out for this summer, and I'm glad that I'm bringing home the bacon so my honey doesn't have to.
This year, I was told that I was being moved to a different health center from the one I've been in for the past three summers. I never like the idea of change (although I'm usually fine with it once it happens, and this doesn't apply at all to moving), but for me, this was more than that. When I was moved from JIG Health Center to Boys Health Center three years ago, I was surprised, but a bit relieved. My supervisor at JIG was really hard for me to handle. While she is a good Christian woman, she talks a lot, and she talks a lot about herself and her family. Do you know those kinds of people? I know that when she asks a general question about my kids, she really expects me to answer in one sentence while she then goes on for ten minutes talking about her kids....and her step kids, and her step kids' boyfriends and girlfriends...and her ex-husband with whom she is still friends. I don't mind this so much, except that I actually listen, and at the end of an eight hour shift with this, I have a killer headache. No joke, I leave emotionally drained.
So, the idea of heading back to JIG and to this same supervisor was literally making me ill. And incredibly depressed. I just couldn't imagine having to spend five days a week for the next three weeks with her, as well as have nobody at home when I got home. Everyday leading up to the start of work, I was considering quitting. John even lovingly offered to just pay the full tuition amount for Glo so that I could just come home.
However, I wanted to give it a couple of days if possible, and while the day loomed closer, a thought came to my head.
I frequently pray that people will change. I pray that they will see (at least in this case) how tiring or annoying or hard-to-live-with they are. Or I pray that they will change, or that maybe my situation will change so that I don't need to deal with them.
This time, however, I took a different route. It's a route that my own husband mastered when he was probably three years old, and that my children probably already know. It's something that I should know, but being emotionally stunted in some ways, it's never occurred to me.
I decided to pray that I would be able to handle the incessant diatribes of my supervisor, and that I wouldn't be so bothered by them. In other words, I prayed for my own strength instead of hoping that someone else would be different.
And do you know what? It's worked. And not only that, it's worked so brilliantly that this is probably the best situation for work that I've ever had at Interlochen.
Here's an example:
In the past, when this supervisor asked me about my kids, and then cut me off and started talking about her own, I would be frustrated, wondering when I was going to get my chance to talk. And I would spend the ten minutes while she was talking thinking about what I was going to say and how I was going to get a word in edgewise. And then, just when it was my turn, she would either leave, or a patient would come in, or something would prevent me from sharing my story. In other words, I would have great expectations of us having a meaningful discussion, and when we didn't, I would hate her and the situation.
Now? I have no expectations. I see Nancy as a child of God who is just trying to do her best in this world. And too, I appreciate that she has no malicious intentions. She really has no idea that she is the way she is.
And I'm just fine with it all. I listen to her for as long as I can, and then I stand up and go do something else. And unlike me, she takes no offense from that (which I probably would).
It's been a wake-up call for me, and a great learning experience. And as it turns out, it's been the best summer I've had at Interlochen so far. I really do love going to work with Nancy and Jay each morning. Unfortunately, I'm not good "on the fly" and I don't know if I could call on these powers in a situation that I don't expect. However, I'm glad that it worked out for this summer, and I'm glad that I'm bringing home the bacon so my honey doesn't have to.
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