Over Thanksgiving, everyone was home, and on Sunday, I had Mark and Johannah joining Glo and me in the pew at church. There's a feeling of safety in that for me; something about knowing that I have a micro Kennedy army of my adult children to protect me from people who don't treat me very well. As a result, I felt safe attending Sunday School, being surrounded by my lovely children.
During the lesson, the teacher was trying to make the point that when our young children come to us, asking a question, if we let them figure it out themselves, they will generally come up with a different, but better solution than we could have given them. She then asked the class, "Isn't that true?"
While I wasn't trying to literally answer the question, I shook my head "no", and she caught the nod. She then looked straight at me and asked, "You disagree?"
Oh boy. Deep breath.
Without really pausing (again, it's like I gain superpowers of bravery when my kids are around), I said, "I don't agree. I think that there is a lot to be gained from the wisdom of people who have lived longer than I have."
She was kind, and she smiled, and moved on. I do believe I wasn't contributing to the point she was trying to make.
I've given my comment some extra thought since then. Do I really believe it? I know what she was trying to say. It is good to teach children to be independent thinkers, and to not be forever dependent on their parents for answers to problems. However, I don't believe in letting children learn through all experiences. (That probably would have been a better way to phrase what I was thinking.) We parents naturally know more because we've lived longer. In all honesty, it's the same with Heavenly Father. He has an eternity of experiences, and he tells us what is best for us. We have seen the dangers of doing certain things, and we would like to protect our children from being hurt. It's up to all of us to choose what we want to do....and it's the same for our children.
I have several purposes for keeping this blog. One is that I want to hang onto every memory I have. Since I know that my brain can't physically do this as I age, I write things down for later on. Two, I think whenever anyone shares their thoughts on paper (?), others feel a closeness to them that can't be achieved any other way. Through conversation, ideas are frequently cut off, or someone doesn't have time for ideas to simmer before they express themselves. Reading someone's thoughts, however, gives everyone a chance to think things through and get the full story before making any judgement. The third, and probably the main reason I keep this blog, is so that my children can learn from me. Both John and I frequently feel that we are finding our way through life, because we had so few examples of anything growing up. No examples of parenting, or healthy marriages, or active members of the church, or financially sound decision makers. Nothing. However, I would give my right leg to have had some of those. I think of all the mistakes that could have been avoided if we'd just had someone who could have taught us. While we've been independent thinkers and come up with our own answers to problems, we know that there were probably better solutions out there. We just couldn't figure it all out.
So, if in one of my many blog posts, my children learn something (or my grandchildren who will no doubt read some of these someday), this blog has been worth it.
And here is a lesson for this day. Don't say I didn't tell you what to do! ;-)
In my patriarchal blessing, I am commanded to "be loving and kind and thoughtful about the needs of others." This is the only line that I have memorized from my patriarchal blessing, and it runs through my head frequently. While other people (like your father) don't need this line, or this reminding (because kindness comes naturally to him), the Lord obviously felt the need to spell this out for me...literally. And it has been such a blessing in my life. I'm not sure that I would make such an effort to think about others if it wasn't a specific commandment to me personally.
The Lord is all powerful, all knowing, and all wise. You see, in telling me to be that way, he has saved me from a lifetime of a lesser life. By being thoughtful, I have made some of my closest friends. By being kind, I have been able to give of all that the Lord has given me. And by being loving, I have formed close and lasting relationships with my husband and my children.
It's one thing to remember to be kind to those who don't treat us well, but it can be incredibly difficult to be kind to those who aren't to us. In the end, I'm going to follow the counsel of a wise Heavenly Father, and just continue to be thoughtful about that person's needs, and forget about my own.
Phew. That's hard to say, but I do believe that if I was left up to my own devices, looking for a solution on my own, I would not have the better result that Heavenly Father's wisdom will give me.
And there is your lesson for the day. Take it and do with it what you will.
During the lesson, the teacher was trying to make the point that when our young children come to us, asking a question, if we let them figure it out themselves, they will generally come up with a different, but better solution than we could have given them. She then asked the class, "Isn't that true?"
While I wasn't trying to literally answer the question, I shook my head "no", and she caught the nod. She then looked straight at me and asked, "You disagree?"
Oh boy. Deep breath.
Without really pausing (again, it's like I gain superpowers of bravery when my kids are around), I said, "I don't agree. I think that there is a lot to be gained from the wisdom of people who have lived longer than I have."
She was kind, and she smiled, and moved on. I do believe I wasn't contributing to the point she was trying to make.
I've given my comment some extra thought since then. Do I really believe it? I know what she was trying to say. It is good to teach children to be independent thinkers, and to not be forever dependent on their parents for answers to problems. However, I don't believe in letting children learn through all experiences. (That probably would have been a better way to phrase what I was thinking.) We parents naturally know more because we've lived longer. In all honesty, it's the same with Heavenly Father. He has an eternity of experiences, and he tells us what is best for us. We have seen the dangers of doing certain things, and we would like to protect our children from being hurt. It's up to all of us to choose what we want to do....and it's the same for our children.
I have several purposes for keeping this blog. One is that I want to hang onto every memory I have. Since I know that my brain can't physically do this as I age, I write things down for later on. Two, I think whenever anyone shares their thoughts on paper (?), others feel a closeness to them that can't be achieved any other way. Through conversation, ideas are frequently cut off, or someone doesn't have time for ideas to simmer before they express themselves. Reading someone's thoughts, however, gives everyone a chance to think things through and get the full story before making any judgement. The third, and probably the main reason I keep this blog, is so that my children can learn from me. Both John and I frequently feel that we are finding our way through life, because we had so few examples of anything growing up. No examples of parenting, or healthy marriages, or active members of the church, or financially sound decision makers. Nothing. However, I would give my right leg to have had some of those. I think of all the mistakes that could have been avoided if we'd just had someone who could have taught us. While we've been independent thinkers and come up with our own answers to problems, we know that there were probably better solutions out there. We just couldn't figure it all out.
So, if in one of my many blog posts, my children learn something (or my grandchildren who will no doubt read some of these someday), this blog has been worth it.
And here is a lesson for this day. Don't say I didn't tell you what to do! ;-)
In my patriarchal blessing, I am commanded to "be loving and kind and thoughtful about the needs of others." This is the only line that I have memorized from my patriarchal blessing, and it runs through my head frequently. While other people (like your father) don't need this line, or this reminding (because kindness comes naturally to him), the Lord obviously felt the need to spell this out for me...literally. And it has been such a blessing in my life. I'm not sure that I would make such an effort to think about others if it wasn't a specific commandment to me personally.
The Lord is all powerful, all knowing, and all wise. You see, in telling me to be that way, he has saved me from a lifetime of a lesser life. By being thoughtful, I have made some of my closest friends. By being kind, I have been able to give of all that the Lord has given me. And by being loving, I have formed close and lasting relationships with my husband and my children.
It's one thing to remember to be kind to those who don't treat us well, but it can be incredibly difficult to be kind to those who aren't to us. In the end, I'm going to follow the counsel of a wise Heavenly Father, and just continue to be thoughtful about that person's needs, and forget about my own.
Phew. That's hard to say, but I do believe that if I was left up to my own devices, looking for a solution on my own, I would not have the better result that Heavenly Father's wisdom will give me.
And there is your lesson for the day. Take it and do with it what you will.
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